742: Happy In Your Own Skin With Visa Shanmugam

Visa Shanmugam is a mindset and empowerment coach for professional women who believes that every single woman is worthy, Happy In Your Own Skin With Visa Shanmugamdeserving and capable of creating a life that she dreams of.  She helps successful and driven women who find themselves lost, confused and disconnected from their life, embark on a spiritual journey to transform their inner world, so that they can create a life of abundance, alignment, purpose and joy. So that you can live life with EASE and FLOW.

Visa shares the one question that her life coach asked her that made her realize that her made her think about her true self and since then she has been able to embrace her imperfections and be happy in her own skin.  Check out her episode to listen to her story.

Bio

Visa Shanmugam is a mindset and empowerment coach for women.

Cultural Background

Visa is of Indian descent.

Favorite Self Confidence Quote

Confidence is not they will like me. Confidence instead is I’ll be fine if they don’t.

Confidence is not they will like me. Confidence instead is I’ll be fine if they don’t.

Definition of Self Confidence

Self confidence is being so sure of who you are, spirit, body and soul, that you don’t need the love and adoration of others to make you feel whole. You have all the love in the world for yourself to make yourself feel whole.

Her Life Before the Discovery of Self Confidence

Visa was a people pleaser. Her self esteem was tied to her grades, her work achievements, how much her managers recognized her talent at work and her work bonuses, promotions, pay increases etc.  Her self confidence was like a yo-yo because it was tied to external variables.  She craved validation, recognition and appreciation from others in order to feel good.  She placed responsibility to help her feel good, like her husband.  She was miserable, without knowing why she was so miserable.  She kept chasing success but she never seemed to be able to get it and the few fleeting moments she got it, it felt as though it slipped away from her hands.

Her health also took a major hit because of her emotional turmoil that she was experiencing and she had no idea that the two were connected. As her self confidence has grown, she has also seen a major improvement in her physical health.

The “AHA” Moment

Visa doesn’t think there is one single moment for her. It’s been gradual. But she would say one of the most significant moments is when she was working with a life coach and she asked her what she liked about herself and she went silent. It really shocked her that she couldn’t find things to like.  She always thought she was pretty confident, sociable and intelligent (which she thought equated to self confidence), but this question astounded her and made her realize that she honestly had a hard time celebrating who she was.

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Her Life After the Discovery of Self Confidence

Once Visa made the discovery that she needed to work more on finding things she liked about herself, it’s been a journey of self discovery and self-love.  She has learnt to embrace her imperfections, which has made life so much more fun and easier.  She doesn’t beat herself up anymore, which she can tell you is like a huge weight has been lifted off her shoulders.  She is more patient with her children. she has an amazing relationship with her husband. She has found her mission in life, which is to help other high achieving women learn to like and love themselves, so that they can have a life that feels joyful and authentic. She is so happy in her own skin, which is a priceless gift to give to herself.

The One Self Confidence Tip For the Listener

Learn to be kind, patient and gentle with yourself. Learn to look for the wins and celebrate them and spend less time trying to fix things that you deem are wrong with you. The more time you spend celebrating your awesomeness, the things you are trying to work on, will either improve by themselves or fall away.

You don’t magically wake up with confidence one day. No matter what might change in your physical world, confidence has to come from within. Just because you get that promotion or you lose that body weight, doesn’t mean that you wake up with more confidence. It comes from doing, from showing up to life and with having the courage to be yourself.

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