161: Stop Living For Others With Olivia Chiong

Olivia Chiong is the author of a small business productivity book, The UnBusy Entrepreneur. Her focus is helping entrepreneurs become more productive by leveraging technology and outsourcing. She enjoys working with small business owners because she believes small is powerful. On the personal front, Olivia is the co-founder of Singapore’s only same-sex parents support group Rainbow Parents SG and she talks about same-sex relationships, parenting and other life hacks on my personal blog.

Olivia was living a life based on other people’s standards. How she dress, where to go to school, what job to apply for and more. She realized that the more she tried to live for others, the more miserable she was. Find out how Olivia was able to stop living for others and started living for herself.

Bio

Olivia Chiong is the author of a small business productivity book, The UnBusy Entrepreneur and co-founder of Singapore’s only same-sex parents support group Rainbow Parents SG

Cultural Background

Olivia is of Taiwanese, Chinese and Indonesian descent.

Favorite Self Confidence Quote

Don’t waste your energy trying to change opinions. Do your thing and don’t care if they like it.

Definition of Self Confidence

The belief in yourself that you can do it and the courage to accept it when you achieve something but its not all you expected it to be. It’s ok to try and fail, but it sucks to never try. I never want to live my life with regrets.

Her Life Before the Discovery of Self Confidence

Olivia used to do things for the approval of others. Then she realized that no matter how much she tries, she can never please everyone. As a child, she worked hard to get good grades, but it was never good enough. She wasn’t particularly fat, but she wasn’t thin either and people would always comment about her weight. Even how she wore her hair (long, short, up, down) would attract comments. Born in a typical Asian family exposes you to so much passive-aggressive behaviour and snide remarks every time you meet relatives that she dreaded family gatherings.

The “AHA” Moment

When Olivia was in her 20s, she was a workaholic, partied, smoked and drank a lot. Lost a lot of weight in a short period of time and started dating a woman for the first time. Everyone fixated on the fact that she was now thin and it didn’t matter that she was terribly unhealthy at that point. All that mattered was that she was thin. When her relationship eventually crashed and burnt, she almost killed herself. It was during my road to recovery that Olivia realized what other people thought really didn’t matter. What was most important was how she felt about herself.

Her Life After the Discovery of Self Confidence

Olivia is a much happier person and she is comfortable with herself. Her self confidence has given her the strength and courage to do the things she wants in life without worrying about what others think. She lives life for herself now.